Friday, April 20, 2012
I didn’t begin writing this to throw a pity party.
I’ve just been thinking about how attractive “going back to church” might be. I want so badly to be a part of a community of believers. I want to have brothers and sisters to pour myself into and to be ministered to by them. I thought about attending some worship services, church shopping, and even going to an accountability community group. The problem is that my knowledge from experiencing these things gets in the way. From what I know about these forms of gathering, I will not find what I’m looking for. What I will find is a bunch of people busy doing things to build community with one another but to busy to actually have relationships.
I’m not interested…well…I am kinda interested…I mean, something is better than nothing, right?
[sigh] I don’t know what to do. The two groups of believers I am most interested in sharing life with both have a leader among them that doesn’t want me around. That makes things pretty tough. The shared life experiences I’ve had in the last couple months or so have been so sporadic that they aren’t even week to week let alone day by day. The truth of how much we need each other and how important community is for the Body of Christ has been made very real to me through experience. I thank God that Christ Jesus never leaves us or forsakes us.
No doubt, during this time God has been near and revealing Himself to us in ways that are nothing short of miraculous. His mercies are never failing and His faithfulness continues. This I also know from experience. I guess we all go through seasons and all seasons have their goal and purpose. I’m just anxious for this season to be over. This hallway between one door closing and another opening seems to go on for miles.
So much for not throwing a pity party. Maybe the veins are finally opening.
Posted by Bobby Auner at 12:30 PM