Sunday, December 12, 2010

desperate persistence

Mr. Grumble has left the building.
Everyday I find myself tempted to grumble to God for calling me out of Egypt and into the wilderness. If you have been reading my blog you probably know by now that I use Egypt as a symbol of organized religion.

Having faith that God will bring me through to complete my journey is my only refuge and hope.  I miss having regular fellowship with my brothers and sisters that are still in the institutional church.  I love and miss them all very much. Knowing that the only real fellowship we can have is in Christ; that is my most comforting thought.  All is not lost, relationships built are not wasted.  I haven't left the people in my heart and spirit but I could no longer remain present with them in the services and programs.

Jesus may be known in the institution and in the wilderness but he is experienced in his fullness in the promised land. We are still united in Christ (at least in thought) but I want it to be more real.  No polite cordiality, no programs to hide behind, no paid professionals expected to do all the work, no systems to maintain and be devoted to to.  Just Christ in us, that is what I want to be a part of.  Christ is all and in all.  He is the beginning and the end.  The firstborn from the dead.  He learned obedience through what he suffered.  Oh! how I want to know him more!  To know more fully what it means to be IN him and have him IN me and to be a part of a gathering that is devoted to putting all our energies into building one another up IN Christ.

I want him in his fullness, I'm done with good enough.  God help me not to grumble or to turn back.

4 comments:

  1. Can you invite an institutionalized family or two over for a meal and have some fellowship around Christ? Ask some good questions? Ask them to go camping with you at a state park? Have fellowship there over a wiener roast? Don't wait for fellowship to come to you. Go get it and set an example before their eyes.

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  2. very good advise Tim. I could work harder in this area.

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  3. How long ago did you leave?

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  4. Sol, I'm not sure how long it has been. Less than a year, I know. Still yet, it has been much longer than eleven days journey. That is how long it takes to walk a straight line from Egypt and cross the Jordan. Eleven days. I guess the distance is directly related to the difference between myself and Christ. The perfectly faithful and obedient one. In him I find the rest I need, even in this dry and weary land.

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